What About a BDSM-Based Life Coach?

I’m imagining someone – a Dom – who’s willing to help people – um, submissive people – meet whatever life goals they have.  Only instead of coaching, they use a paddle.  And other disciplinary techniques.

I have a job coach now, well, a “leadership” coach.  I’m sure it will be interesting and probably helpful.  But think how much fun it would be if it were combined with BDSM.

He’d have to accept you as a student first.  It wouldn’t be about the relationship with him except for him (or her) being a mentor.  And the Master.

Having orgasms would be a reward for meeting goals.  It wouldn’t be about pleasuring him as a goal, it would be your own life-enhancing goals, supported by his discipline.  So instead of sex with him as a common-place, that might become a big reward as you grew to respect and honor him.

Hmmmmmm {Walks away thinking…}


And a Sickly Christmas

Really, if i were you, i would not even read this.  There is nothing kinky here, nothing particularly interesting.  So keep your expectations low.  Real low.

My grandson was sick a couple of days ago -throwing up sick, throwing up big-time sick.  Last night, my daughter got sick and went to bed early (for her.)

This morning, my granddaughter is sick, and tells me she threw up in the middle of the night.  (Thankfully, my poor sick daughter apparently handled that.)

I’ve had a cold for a week, which is slowly getting better, but this morning my head aches a bit.  At least I’m not feeling the urge to throw up.  Knock on wood.

But on the brighter side, none of us are seriously chronically ill, and no one is fatally ill, or even go-to-the-hospital ill.  In fact, not even a doctor run for anyone.  Knock on wood. So it’s all good.

My tooth has stayed glued in place – knock on wood – is not hurting – and I’m enjoying a lovely array of liquid nutrients.

The stockings are hung (albeit not stuffed) and the presents are bought (not wrapped.)  I this is probably about as good as it gets.



Holiday of Humility

Not the kinky kind.

You know this is my secret diary, right?  So i share the things here that i won’t talk about other places.  So here’s this one.

I have an old crown on one of my front teeth.  It had come off about 3 times when i lived Where-i-Used-to-Live and my dentist had put it back on for cheap all 3 times. Well, the other day it came off again.

So i had to find a new dentist, real quick.  Which I did.  And he was really nice and he cemented the crown back in and he charged me $280.00.

So, fine, this is why God made credit cards, right?  At least I had a tooth for Christmas.

Until last night.  Last night, I bit down on a piece of food, but I hit the fork instead, hit it hard and kind of funny, and I knew this was going to be bad.  Nothing happened for a minute, and I thought maybe it would be ok.  But no.

The crown came off – again – and this time it broke off part of the post that it was cemented on to.

Fuck me running.

It’s Saturday.  Tomorrow is, predictably Sunday.  Then Christmas.

Fuck me running.  Three days before the dentist office will be open again.

I found an emergency dentist who’s open today.  It will cost $180.00 just to see him.  JUST for the office visit.  Not counting anything else.   AND i’m not even sure there is a short-term fix now that the post is broken.

i’ve glued the crown in myself, with that over-the-counter stuff they have.  If i eat food that you have to chew, the crown will probably come off again and will be more difficult to put back in.

I do not want to spend $180, probably for nothing.   I just don’t think I’m going to do it.  I think I’m just going to stick with food that doesn’t actually need to be chewed until Tuesday.

There are worse things.  This is a clear reminder that the world does not have to go the way I want it to, and it’s ok.



Where does all that feeling even come from?  All that serving and pleasing stuff. I’m mad at myself for even feeling that way – I didn’t even quite know all that was there {still there} until i wrote it.  Fuck.

My energy does not need to be spent on cock worship and fucking.  OG is not going to be my Dom, or my lover, He’s a nice man who offered to spank my ass because i need that.  That’s what i need to be saying to myself four times.  Slowly.  With feeling.

On the other hand, {sigh} there’s no point in berating myself for having the feelings i have.  They are just there.  And this is the best place to let them be.



A Moment of Sadness

I’ve been continuing to chat with this other guy from Fet who is clearly not my cup of tea, but a nice enough guy.  He’s the kind of guy that when I told him I had a cold and was losing my voice said something about oh, at least I wouldn’t be able to use my safe word.  Ok, haha, whatever.

So we’ve been emailing back and forth when we’re not busy – we both work from home, on computers, so there’s time.  Tonight he asked about my voice and I said it was gone – well, maybe 90% gone.

There’s a pause, and then he emails back, “Is your partner happy?”  And for a moment, I’m confused.  Like why wouldn’t he be happy?  Or why would he be happy?  Or – oh, wait, I get it.

Ha.   Ha.   Ha.

He meant because I’d lost my voice.  He was thinking that MP would be happy because he wouldn’t have to listen to me.  Kidding about it, right?

But it’s a meanness.

And for a minute, i imagine living in that world.  Where women are bitches and men are assholes.  Where women nag and have to be kept in their place – not in a consensual way.  i feel a huge rush of sadness, because i remember what it was like back when i kind of lived in that world.  And then relief  – and gratitude that i don’t live in that world now.